commit ebdc5f876f347f0d2bc804a0e27a1762c1da4559 Author: Colin Childs colin@torproject.org Date: Mon Oct 17 23:10:34 2016 -0500
Clean up some phrasing based on feedback --- C/about-tor-browser.page | 15 +++++++-------- 1 file changed, 7 insertions(+), 8 deletions(-)
diff --git a/C/about-tor-browser.page b/C/about-tor-browser.page index 97e960a..b0b551b 100644 --- a/C/about-tor-browser.page +++ b/C/about-tor-browser.page @@ -16,10 +16,9 @@ <list> <item> <p> - Your internet activity, including the names and addresses of - the websites you visit, will be hidden from your Internet - service provider and from anyone watching your connection - locally. + Your internet service provider, and anyone watching your connection + locally, will not be able to track your internet activity, including + the names and addresses of the websites you visit. </p> </item> <item> @@ -43,7 +42,7 @@ is exited or a <link xref='managing-identities#new-identity'>New Identity</link> is requested). </p> - + <!-- XXX: ask Tor Browser team/mikeperry about things that are worth adding here. -->
@@ -60,9 +59,9 @@ <media type="image" width="600" src="media/how-tor-works.png" /> <p> The image above illustrates a user browsing to different websites - over Tor. The green monitors represent relays in the Tor network, - while the three keys represent the layers of encryption between the - user and each relay. + over Tor. The green middle computers represent relays in the Tor + network, while the three keys represent the layers of encryption + between the user and each relay. </p> </section> </page>